I hear my cellphone ring on a Friday evening, I look down and I’m hesitant to answer because it’s you. I answer because I care about you and I know you care about me too. “Hey, do you want to meet up tonight for dinner, maybe a drink or something?”, you say. Silence comes…
Tag: tired
What Happens If You Come Over Unannounced – Spoonie Edition
My phone rings and it’s a family member on the line saying, “Hey, I am right by your house, I am going to stop by and see you!”. “Great, of course I want to see you, see you soon”, I say. My heart sinks into my stomach and panic has just set in. When you…
My Answer To You, When You Ask “Why I Don’t Have Real Kids?”
I can hear the whispers and I can see the laugher. The way you look at me when you pass then look into the stroller I am pushing and you see furry animals instead of a human baby. I feel embarrassed and the look on your face makes me feel like I should be…
How Chronic Illness Showed Me My Best Quality: Perseverance
I can say growing up I never really had a ‘niche’. I was always trying new activities and trying to fit in. Since I was a little girl, I felt like I was an outcast or I just wasn’t up to ‘par’ like the other kids. As I continued to grow I ended up finding…
When Lupus Makes You Break Up With Your First Love: the Sun
When I was younger, people used to always compliment my skin tone. I would have so many family and friends tell me how no matter how long I would stay in the sun, I would never burn. I never used sunscreen and it would take me days to look like I even went into the…
Dealing With Cancellation Policies When You Are Chronically Ill
OK, so maybe it’s just me… maybe I’m letting my emotions get the best of me. But I have something that need to get off my chest and share with others to see how they feel. This has been really bothering me lately and I doubt you’d ever imagine what it would be, but I…
When Lupus Causes You to Feel Internally Torn
As I write this I can feel tears fall down my face and my heart break just a little bit more. I have never felt so torn in my life – physically and mentally. Since my diagnosis I haven’t really come to terms with what I have for many reasons… sometimes my doctor thinks other…
When Loved Ones Make You Feel Alone in Your Battle With Chronic Illness
My heart feels like it’s been broken into a million pieces. That I am standing in a dark room seeing all the scattered glass around me. Crawled into a ball I am trying to hold back the tears, trying to put the pieces of my puzzling life back together. It’s becoming harder and harder to…
One Tough Spoonie 