It hurts. It feels as if my heart has been ripped from my chest and stepped on right in front of me. I feel hollow, confused, lost, and devastated. Yet again, it’s another diagnosis. I never knew that it would just keep adding up. That my life would become a game of whack-a-mole. There was…
Tag: thoughts
Dear Husband From Your Chronically Ill Wife(Valentine’s Day Letter)
Dear Husband, I would like to first say, I love you. That I couldn’t be more thankful nor grateful for anything else in my life as I am with you. We’ve spent many Valentine’s together and I couldn’t be happier. Though this one feels different. I am not sure why, but it just does. …
You Are Not Alone ( From Another Chronically Ill Person To You)
You, sitting there with your hands covering your face, wiping the tears from your eyes, breathing heavily, feeling ever so broken inside; the one who is chronically ill, living with chronic pain. I see you. I am actually one of you. And I am terribly sorry that your pain has gotten so bad. As someone…
My Open Letter To Lupus
Dear Lupus, I am writing to tell you that I want you out of my life! I am sick and tired of you interfering and wreaking havoc in my body. I hate the way you’ve changed my entire life! I hate the way I no longer do many of the things or activities I used…
All I Want For Christmas- Is A Better Life With Lupus
It’s the holiday season. Everyone is cheerful and filled with glee. The stores are busy, almost everyone has packages outside their door, and beautiful holiday lights that make the night sky glisten. Everyone is starting to ask what you want as a gift for the holidays! Do you want new shoes, new top, or some…
How Lupus Makes Me Feel Grateful For My Birthday
It’s November, my favorite month of the year. I think it’s truly the most beautiful time of the year. A reminder that life is always changing and ongoing. Not only is my favorite holiday in November, but it’s also my birthday month. This year I will be 27 years old. I can’t explain why, but…
How Depression And Anxiety Have Shaped Who I Am Today For The Better
My life is a mess. I literally don’t know if I am coming or going… The problem is I can’t ever think back to a time where my life was anything but a disaster. As I’ve grown up, I truly thought I wasn’t affected by certain things in my childhood. Standing here today, I can…
When You Can No Longer Smile Through The Pain
To be chronically ill and live with chronic pain, you have no choice but to try and be strong. You must smile through the pain, not show the worry on your face, pretend you’re OK when you’re not, and hold back countless tears. For the most part, I’d like to say that I do pretty well…
How Chronic Illness Makes Me Feel Insecure With My Marriage
Have you ever thought that one day you’d wake up and your life would completely change? Did you ever think that you might lose the person you once were? I know, I didn’t. I always saw myself as fun, spontaneous, and happy. If someone asked me to describe myself today, I couldn’t imagine using any…
When the ER Cannot Help You and Your Autoimmune Disease
Where do you go when you feel the worst you’ve ever felt in your life? Where do you go when you feel like you need immediate medical attention or something bad is going to happen? The last resort when you just can’t handle it anymore? Most of us would answer, the hospital! Well that is…
One Tough Spoonie 